uh, right, about the blog then...

so....the blog, eh?

well, what started with good intentions back before xmas subsequently became delayed by a substantial amount of laziness, moreso a procrastination fed by self-doubt; the doubt that i was interesting enough to be considered. but in truth i find this more or less a false sense of humility tempered only by my desire to make my thoughts known to however big or small an audience this may turn out to be.

can i get more circular than this? watch me.

from another perspective, i know well that writing has served me in the past as a profound source of reflection, even if that reflection simply involves my seeing just how silly hypocritical i can be from the inside out. most of that writing took place in the form of correspondence written to friends and family during my time spent living overseas and, while the letters certainly were addressed to other individuals, i quickly found that i was actually reflecting and writing to myself.  expressing experience through words which "pointed towards" what the machinations of my interior sideshow revealed.

it was during these daily writing exercises that i witnessed some profound moments of insight: caught in the midst of sentence, pen in hand, trapped in some kind of luminious interior cinema. it became a way to objectify what had previously been subject (not that i was necessarily aware of this specifically from the outset). over and over again what had at one time been subject in one moment became the object of the subject of the next. over and over again. at the time though i was simply happy enough that the activity seemed to clear my mind of the chaos by ordering the echoes and mental tangents into some kind of cohesive narrative: a story about myself that i appeared happy enough with to believe. that is, until the story collapsed in a heap of shedded skin, when i first poked through the case of mistaken identity that is the basis of most of our lives. following that, i pretty much stayed away from writing altogether.

so, i have decided to begin again - to use this practice to allow the subject to become object once again. it is a bonus, i suppose, if any one chooses to actually read what shows up in this spotted column. IT IS FOR ME principally - let's be honest about that. BUT, that said, let's be particularly honest about the other side of the coin: that i'd be writing this in a paper bound journal for my eyes only if it were really just for me.  truth be told, i'd love to share with you people what i think, what i do, what impresses itself upon me, all somewhat in the realm of food and frolic. you dig? let's just hope that there's one more space for me there in your rss feeder.

i have been an avid reader of blogs for the past couple of years but have never contributed to the stream of word-flow; i always just seemed pleased enough to consume what others had expelled from their minds with the odd comment thrown in here and there. but the times they are a changin'. i figure that it high time to start putting myself "out there", take a chance, perhaps sound like a consumate goof now and then, share some of myself with those to whom i indirectly owe hour upon hour of great reading material. maybe throw in a recipe or two for all y'all.

DEAL?!

may i first pay tribute to those who have forged this path - if it weren't for you, i might have actually done this much earlier. hah! i've had too much stuff to read to really bother with writing anymore! :-) much love to you:

rommel the cool one, matthew mr.art, wrench the word smith, stoo the hyperbolist, paul the multiple manifest-er, vince the sitter, ottmar the music-man, dan the whole, chris the ND xian mystic. thanks for your efforts, i have thoroughly enjoyed them.

i swear, the next entry is going to have something to do with food.

mad love in a boiling pot of potatoes,

~chef